BLAC Love: Why Time Away is as Important as Time Together

This article was originally published on BLAC Detroit.

When you think of having a healthy relationship, you most likely imagine spending time with your partner often, having no arguments, and loving each other without distractions. However, while you should spend time together, you can’t overlook the benefits of spending time away from each other. In fact, spending time away from each other can strengthen your relationship and help you and your partner grow as individuals. 

Benefits of Time Away in a Relationship

Spending time apart from each other is incredibly beneficial for both partners and the relationship. It allows each partner to focus on their personal growth and interests, which can lead to increased self-awareness and confidence. 

When you both have time to pursue individual goals and hobbies, you can bring new experiences and perspectives to the relationship. This alone can lead to a deeper appreciation for each other’s strengths and interests.

Additionally, spending time apart can provide an opportunity to reflect on the relationship. When you and your partner are apart, you both have a chance to think about the dynamics of the relationship, identify where you can improve, and plan for ways to strengthen your bond. 

This reflection can lead to better communication skills in the relationship, improved conflict resolution, and a stronger emotional connection.

Why You and Your Partner Should Maintain Individual Identity

One of the most significant risks of spending all your time with your partner is the potential loss of your individual identity. When couples spend all their time together, they may begin to adopt each other’s habits, interests, and even personalities. 

When you can’t tell where you start and where your partner ends, you might experience personal identity and a sense of being absorbed into the relationship. Maintaining individual identity is vital because each partner can maintain a sense of self and independence. When you pursue your interests and passions, you bring more to the relationship and create a more dynamic partnership. 

Having a strong sense of self can also build more resilient partnerships during life’s challenges. It can also prevent codependency and unhealthy attachment patterns, which can strain the relationship.

How to Make Time Away Work in Your Relationship

Making time apart work in your relationship requires intentional effort and clear communication. Here are some tips to help you make the most of your time apart:

• Set Boundaries: Before spending time apart, establish clear boundaries and expectations with your partner. Discuss how often you plan to spend time apart, the activities you’ll pursue, and how you’ll communicate with each other during your time apart. Having a prior conversation will help you feel more comfortable and secure in your relationship.
• Communicate Openly: Communication is key to any successful relationship, and it’s especially vital when you’re spending time apart. Be honest with your partner about your needs and feelings, and encourage them to do the same. If you’re feeling lonely or disconnected, don’t be afraid to reach out to the person you love for support.
• Pursue Individual Interests: Use your time apart to pursue your interests and hobbies. Being alone is a great opportunity to explore new activities or deepen your existing passions. When you pursue individual interests, you’ll feel more fulfilled and confident in yourself, which can ultimately strengthen your relationship.
• Schedule Quality Time Together: While it’s important to have time apart, it’s equally vital to schedule quality time together to maintain your emotional connection. Plan regular date nights or other activities that allow you to connect with your partner and show them how much you value them.
• Be Flexible: Finally, it’s essential to embrace flexibility and adaptability when spending time apart. You never know what life has in store and you may need to change plans at the last minute. When you’re flexible and open-minded, you’ll navigate the ups and downs of your relationship better and come out stronger on the other side.

There you have it! Now you know why you should spend time away from your partner. Think of the massive benefits for you and your relationships and how you can both grow as individuals. It’s never too late to start new habits and traditions that will benefit your relationship!